Don't ever judge a person on what you have heard about them or their image or what they do with their lives. No one can see what thoughts actually goes on through their minds. Most importantly no one can actually be defined until after they have died... because every second we are on this planet we can change. We will change. The more one judges people based on nothing but mere speculation, the more harm it causes--to themselves, to others, and to the world at large.
As for me people can label me as many things, but I can promise you one thing... my 1000+ friends on here have no idea what I have been through or know me for anything more then what I have allowed them to know or the lies, rumors, or speculations about me are out there. There is maybe 6 people who know my deepest secret... the biggest thing I have ever have to gone through. Even if there has been years for me to "move on" I can never completely forget. And the worst part is, all the judgements about "who I am" are completely off basis form Who I Actually AM. Having to play happy puts a toll on someone. Being told that "its your past you can move forward," or even, "just forget about it," destroys a piece of someone everyday. And it is worse when they do "try to forget about it."
I am Edessa Yousefzadeh. I am labeled as someone who would "push on a door that says pull." I am a new member to Delta Zeta at CSUF. I am labeled as a "party girl." I promote for SWAT. I am labeled as a "nice girl that tends to do too much for her friends." I am a girl with a big heart, that loves to love. I am labeled as "someone who trusts a lot and is an open book." I am a domestic violence victim. I am labeled as "the girl who stayed in the relationship and was at fault because so." I am someone with anxiety and my anxiety has never been so bad as it is now. I can go on and on about what I am labeled as and what I feel like I am, but that can take days...
Labels and judgement aren't who a person is. My name is just the name given to me at birth. Yes, I respond to it, but that is not who I am. What I am involved in does not define me. The labels that people place on me due to speculations are bias and subjective. And everyday I have to try to fight with the fact that I have been through an abusive relationship. We can and do place labels on ourselves. We do live in our past experiences. But this in most cases can only harm us. We are capable of harming ourselves. We inflict harm everyday by allowing our insecurities get the best of ourselves. So imagine when other people outside of us act as if they know us, as if they know our lives... imagine how much influence and effect they have on our livelihood.
So stop projecting your own issues on other people. Stop taking out your anger on something that is outside of your life. Deal with YOU first. Stop with the judging, the belittling, the labeling, the harassment, the bullying-- but first stop with the lies to yourself and then stop lying to others. Embrace who you are and embrace what you want for your life everyday. Other people will always be here with you, but respect them as well. Take a moment to remember that this world is full of people of all shapes, sizes, and color... Most importantly we are all facing everyday life challenges. Some experiences may be worse than others, but some people can also be more equipped to handle it better than others.
We cannot know the feeling of walking in someone else's shoes, because at the end of the day everyone will always be different. No TWO People are alike. That will always be a fact. So man up and reflect inwards before you start reflecting on other lives around you.
